Its All I Truly Want
by EliGoldsworthyforlifeex3
Summary: Eli needs closure so Imogen suggests Eli write Clare a letter explaining his feelings. He writes her a letter explaining all he truly wants.  : Oneshot! Clare/Jake.


**Authors Note: Okaaaay (: So this is how I feel about Degrassi right now... I ADORE Cake! They are just too cute, HOWEVER my heart will always be with Eclare. I HATE Imogen. Like can't stand her -.- Even though im really feelin' Cake, they just dont have Eclare sparks. But this oneshot is about Eli's road to recovery and him deciding whats best for Clares' sake.**

**Anywho, im rambling. On with the ONESHOT. (: Enjoy!**

_**"The only thing I want, is for you to be happy."**_

Eli's POV

I stood at my locker watching them laugh and flirt. It hurt, it really did. It hurt to see her with someone else. But I understand, hes good for her and im not. I just need to face the facts.

"Eli Goldsworthy, how are you on this fine spring day?" I turned and saw Imogen staring me deeply in the eyes. I averted my gaze, suddenly the floor pattern being very interesting. Dont get me wrong, I like Imogen. Shes a great girl, but I just dont feel it with her.

"Hey Imo" I said finally tearing my eyes from the ground to look at her. She had those crazy pigtails and cat ears on. She may be extremely weird, but I was never bored.

"Why were you staring at Clare Edwards and Jake Martin? I thought you didnt like her anymore?" She raised one eyebrow looking at me suspiciously.

"I dont," _Lie_, "I just, I need closure ya know?" That was true, I did need closure. More than anything.

"Okay Eli, since im so amazing, im going to help you get closure," she started and I was about to interupt when she continued,"all you have to do is write Clare a letter letting out all of your feelings, then hand it to her and walk away."

I had to admit, it wasn't a bad plan. "Thanks Imo, thats an amazing idea! Im gonna go get started!"

She giggled, "Okay bye Eli!" And with that i ran to the cafeteria and sat down. I took out a pen and paper. In under 30 minutes, I had everything i needed to say on that piece of paper.

I grabbed my bag and ran to find Clare. This was my free period, and it was also Clares' and Jakes' so i knew they would be together. I soon saw a tall blonde boy holding hands with a smaller girl. Bingo. I walked up to Clare, tapped her shoulder, handed her the note and walked away without a single word. Right as I was walking away I looked up at Jake and I smiled. I really smiled. Then I left and I never looked back.

**Clare's POV**

I felt someone tap my shoulder, I turned around and was face to face with Eli. He wasn't smirking or anything, but I could tell from his eyes that he was happy. It was a nice feeing to know he was okay. He handed me an envelope that had my name written beautifully. I almost couldnt believe Eli wrote it, because he has chicken scratch handwriting.

As soon as I had the note, Eli started to walk away but before he passed Jake he looked up at him and smiled. There was an emotion in Eli's eyes I thought i'd never see him direct at Jake Martin: _**Acceptance**_. He accepted Jake, I could just tell. Then Eli walked off and he never looked back.

I stared at the note and then felt Jake kiss my cheeck, "Im gonna let you read that alone. I'll be in the cafeteria if you need me."

I nodded and he smiled and walked away. I sat down against the row of lockers and opened up the envelope... Out fell a piece of paper that was filled front and back. _Here goes nothing_, I thought.

"_Dear Clare,_

_Im sitting in the cafeteria writing you this letter. Specifically i'm sitting at the table where we ate lunch that one time during crush week. The "Lovers Lunch". Remember how I made you think I didn't want to go to that? Truth is, I really did. I wanted a chance to show everyone how much I loved you. You might not know it, but that lunch meant so much more to me than I led you to believe. _

_Anyways, I'm not here to bore you with the memories of our relationship, because you have the same memories, you were there. I'm actually writing this to tell you, its okay. I'm not angry that your dating Jake, in fact I full on support your relationship. He's good for you Clare. He's what you need. Someone easy going and care free. That's not me Clare. Im the polar opposite of that._

_Sometimes I wonder, what if? What if I hadn't lost Julia last year? What if I never came to Degrassi? What if I never met you? But everytime I think about that I want to cry because life without knowing you would be a life wasted. _

_I love you Clare, I always have and always will. I'll never forget you Blue Eyes. You'll always be the editor of my life story. No matter where I go or what I do, you'll always be there to edit out the mistakes and make my life perfect, even if I cant see you, i'll know. _

_So the last thing I have to say is this, be happy. Thats the one thing I realized today, all I want is for you to be happy. And Jake, he makes you happy. I can tell. Good luck in everything you do Clare Edwards, you truly deserve all the happiness in the world._

_Yours always,_

_Elijah Goldworthy"_

When i was done reading the letter i was full out crying. I had to talk to Eli, to thank him. I ran right out the Degrassi doors and straight to Eli's house. When I got there he was outside. He had 4 big suitcases packed and he was hugging Cece and Bullfrog. He saw me and he smiled. His parents went inside and he walked over to me.

"Your leaving." I said, as more of a statement. He just smirked and hugged me. When we pulled away he whispered "Be happy". He kissed my cheeck, walked over to his brand new hearse, packed his bags and drove away.

I stood and watched till his car was out of sight. I walked back to Degrassi and saw Jake on the front steps. I walked over and hugged him. Eli was right, Jake made me happier than anyone, and all I could think was _"I hope one day Eli finds the girl of his dreams, the girl he's supposed to be with. I hope one day Elijah Goldsworthy can be happy. All i want is for him to be happy."_

**Authors Note: Welllll? That was it. Sorry it didnt end in Eclare but I really feel like Eli truly loved Clare with all his heart, so even though I REALLY want them back together I think that this shows Eli's true love for Clare and vice-versa. But what do you guys think? Reviews? (: **


End file.
